Super Mario Lovers
by firebird377
Summary: What looks like another boring rescue of Princess Peach becomes something very different, as Mario gets more from Bowser than he bargained for...
1. Playing with Fire

Chapter 1 - Playing with Fire

Mario stomped the last Goomba between him and Bowser into oblivion. Now there was nothing stopping him from winning another climatic showdown, rescuing Princess Peach, and her taking his rescue for granted… _again._

Mario sighed as he climbed the steps to Bowser's throne room. "Why do I keep doing this?" he thought to himself. "I never get anything out of it. It's like I just can't resist fighting Bowser."

He entered the throne room and braced himself for a fight. But something was different—Bowser just sat on his throne, clearly not in the fighting mood.

"It's about time you got here, Mario!" said Bowser testily. "Do you have any idea how long you've kept me waiting?"

"Where's the princess, Bowser?" Mario tried to sound intimidating, but his heart wasn't in it.

"Oh, who cares? You're the one I wanted to see, Mario. I _really _wanted to see you." Bowser stood up, showing off his chiselled build.

"What do you mean?" Mario felt his heart start to race faster than a race car.

"Oh Mario," said Bowser. "I may have kidnapped the princess, but you've kidnapped my _heart!"_

"Mama mia!" Mario stared at Bowser in disbelief. He was repulsed, and yet he couldn't stop looking at the Koopa King's muscular figure, phallic spikes and huge, throbbing tail.

"Yes, it's true!" shouted Bowser. "I've loved you ever since you first dropped me into a pit of lava—how could I resist a man with your mighty strength?"

"But that was years ago! Why are you only telling me now?" shouted Mario.

"I was afraid, Mario. Afraid of rejection, afraid of what the Mushroom Kingdom would say, afraid I was lying to myself. But now that I see you standing there, all hot and sweaty… I'm not afraid anymore!"

"You're… you're crazy!" shouted Mario. But a voice inside him whispered, "Maybe he's _not."_

"Don't deny our love, Mario," said Bowser as he stomped towards Mario. "The passion between us is hotter than the hottest fire flower!"

"But you're a giant reptile, and I'm just a plumber!" Mario's knees were growing weak. He felt like he had eaten a poison mushroom.

"I love a man in uniform," hissed Bowser. He was now right in front of Mario, his hot breath singeing the plumber's hair.

"But the princess, I… I… I love her!" Even as Mario said the words he knew they were a lie.

"Your mouth says so, but your moustache says otherwise," whispered Bowser as he swept Mario up in his strong yet gentle arms. "Come—let me take you to my dungeon so you can plumb my pipe."

Mario looked into Bowser's eyes and all resistance faded. "I bet your pipe is a warp zone… to _romance."_


	2. A Princess's Envy

Chapter 2 – A Princess's Envy

Mario had been in Bowser's dungeons before, but this time was different. The traps, whips, restraints and other cruel devices had taken on a very different meaning now that Mario knew Bowser's true feelings about him.

Mario's head had cleared a little as he was carried into the dungeon. As Bowser carried him deeper into the cavernous room he said, "Bowser, before we go any further I must insist that you let Princess Peach go. She served her purpose in luring me here, so let her be free."

"Oh, Mario," sighed Bowser. "I can't say no to anything you ask of me." Bowser pulled a lever which made a trapdoor in the floor open and a cage rise up from it. "Although we could make her watch if you'd like…"

Princess Peach's hands were chained to the cage. Her dress had been dirtied and torn, but she was still very beautiful. And despite being imprisoned by the most dangerous creature in the Mushroom Kingdom, she looked more bored than scared.

"It's about time you showed up, big boy," she crooned. "I've been looking forward to giving you a—wait, what's _he _doing here?"

Mario gulped. "It's not what it looks like, Princess! I'm still here to rescue you, I swear!"

"I wasn't talking to you, Mario," said Peach. "What's _he _doing here, Bowser?" she nodded her head at Mario.

"What are you talking about?" asked Bowser and Mario at once.

"I was hoping to get some alone time you with, King Koopa," said Peach. "So much for that plan, I guess." She sighed and looked sad.

"Alone time? With me?" Bowser looked confused.

"Obviously! Why do you think I keep letting you kidnap me? My guards could easily defeat you if I wanted them to, even though you are very big and strong and muscular…"

Mario gasped. "So all these times I've rescued you, you never once actually wanted my help?"

"Of course not! What would I want with a fat plumber?"

"Don't talk to Mario like that!" roared Bowser. "Just for that, I'm not letting you go! Ever!"

"And I'm not rescuing you," said Mario. "Bowser here appreciates me for who I am."

"And I'm about to show you just how much I appreciate you!" shouted Bowser. "Hey Princess, you're about to find out what you're missing!"

Princess Peach sighed. The men in her life never did anything right.


End file.
